'Dirty' Dancing Out at NKHS [poll]

NKHS' new dance policy prohibits dirty dancing.

Dance floors at homecomings and proms will be looking a bit different this year following some policy changes. For the first time, the town’s sole high school is implementing a “dance contract,” including some new rules on inappropriate dancing.

The “dirty dancing” policy, as it is being dubbed, looks to put a halt to provocative dancing.

“A lot of teachers who chaperone these dances blush at some of the dancing that goes on,” said Sironen. “We want everyone, students and chaperones included, to feel comfortable and have fun at these events.”

The dance contract bars students from “sexually suggestive/explicit dancing,” including dancing that involves “intimate touching of the breasts, buttocks or genitals that simulates sexual activity.”

All dancers must remain upright, with no “sexual squatting or sexual bending” allowed. Hands on knees or on the dance floor with the “buttocks facing or touching your dance partner” is also prohibited.

“I think parents are very unaware of the types of dancing that goes on,” said Sironen.

The increase in provocative and suggestive dancing in recent years (especially the past five) led administrators to implement the new rules and institute a dance contract. Prior to the contract, no outlines had been set for what constituted as dirty dancing. Years ago, former North Kingstown High School Principal Gerald Foley proclaimed “You cross the line when you bump and grind.”

“We never determined what that line was,” said Sironen.

Students are now required to read the new rules and sign a dance contract in order to purchase tickets for any dance or prom. Students bringing guests must also fill out their information on the dance contracts. This year, tickets to dances cannot be purchased at the door.

Students who violate the contract will be taken off the dance floor for a “time out” in the media center. On the second offense, the student’s parents will be called to transport him/her home.

With homecoming approaching this weekend, the new contract and policy will be put to its first test. So far, students have seemed fairly receptive and supportive of the changes, according to Sironen.

In a twist of fate, the high school will be performing none other than “Footloose” for its musical this year.

Brucernri October 27, 2011 at 10:20 PM
You really seem fixated on my behavior. So let me assure you that it was adults correcting wrong behavior or communicating acceptable behavior that influenced me. That is the point of the contract! Read the comments from the students. They are stating that the existing policy is NOT being adhered to. Teenie may think that others are embarrassing themselves, but clearly the behavior has become more widespread, so others aren't so smart. So, at the risk of alienating some who think the contract is "silly", apparently THEY DO need to be told the difference between bumping and grinding and getting NASTY, as you put it. I suppose we can hope that ever student will apply great judgement, but there isn't much evidence to support that, is there? How do you think people learn in the first place? Do you propose that people give up or should the criteria be reinforced with additional communication and clarity? That is all the administration is trying to do.
seed and soil October 27, 2011 at 10:27 PM
Very interesting conversation! Three years ago when one of my kids was still at the high school I recall a morning after discussion around the breakfast table. It was a group of 5 who had slept over after the dance. They were all a-buzz about a performance they all took in. A couple "dancing" was completely surrounded by a tight group. The male lifted the skirt of the female who was wearing a thong panty that exposed her back end completely...apparently the young man rubbed his genital area on her behind for the entire crowd to take in. As one might expect, I asked the kids..."where were the chaperone?"...to be told that because the group is so tight the chaperones can not see what is going on. ~ see next commnet~
seed and soil October 27, 2011 at 10:31 PM
I would hope any rational adult...and the vast majority of high school students as well, would see that this type of thing going in at a public high school event needs to be addressed. I applaud the administration and school board for defining the specifics of what is and is not acceptable. Let's hope they are successful in endorsing.
Steve Sironen October 28, 2011 at 12:11 AM
@Meane, I think that comparing what grown adults do at weddings, and what teenage kids do at the high school's dances are comparing apples to oranges. I went to NK, and quite a few dances. When I went to my first wedding as an adult I SURE didn't think to myself, " Wow, I am just going to do what I did in high school!". Obviously, kids like yours are probably the reason the administration had to come up with a policy like this. If you think that they saw this behavior one time and then decided to come up with a policy, you are mistaken. The only reason people come up with policies is they are tired of telling them the same things over and over, and the others not listening. The teenagers of high school age have very little respect for people in authority, and I charge the parents of these kids with that. And comparing what the kids now do to what the kids did when Elvis came to the forefront of rock and roll, that is a non issue. Jumping up and down at the sight of The King, is different than trying to grope and rub your privates all over someone else. I love weddings, and I love to dance. The administration's policies should be looked at as a way to keep the kids safe, and well behaved. You seem to be against the administration in general. Do you think the administration's implementation of the Prom Promise is a bad idea, too?
Sheila Chappelle October 28, 2011 at 12:39 AM
Yes, they are just kids and it is time someone stepped in and gave them direction as to what is appropriate and what is not appropriate in public. It is time proper values were brought back into society. Parents really need to get back to being parents instead of sitting back and allowing the kids do whatever they want to express themselves.
Steve Sironen October 28, 2011 at 12:59 AM
Right on Sheila. The TV can't raise your children. There are some dance types that involve very, very close bodied dancing. When done right, it is really neat, and beautiful. If they want to dance close, teach them how. Don't let Jersey Shore teach them.
Josh Colacone October 28, 2011 at 06:16 AM
You people are serious right now? Everyone is in an uproar over dancing? Really? I read most of the comments and I think the problem is the parents. I went to the old NKHS and guess what... It was all happening then too. This isn't new. 10 years ago when I was there, there was plenty of drugs, booze and grinding. You know how I made it through? My parents said if you get thrown out of one of the dances for doing something stupid you're gonna get a beatin'. You parents need to look in the mirror if you want to know what's wrong with kids today. There's not a spine amongst you. Let the kids dance. So far meane has the best outlook. Trust your kids to make the right choices. How are they ever honna learn how to make a decision for themselves if everyone does it for them? MeanE is right... Stop the drugs and alcohol first. Thats gonna destroy a kid a lot faster than a little grind-line and some heavy petting! It's a slippery slope, soon there will be boys only and girls only dances of you don't watch out. And personally if I still went to that school I would protest the shit outta this. I would make sure none of my friends went. Hey school board, try making money for the school when the kids boycott your stupid dances!
MeanE October 28, 2011 at 01:54 PM
@SRS -Your comment about apples to oranges and not thinking about high school is exactly my point. Others on here have made a case that what you do at a high school dance carries on to your adult life. "Obviously" kids like mine are some of the finest students that have ever attended NKHS. My daughter is in the top 20 of the class of 2012! She does not engage in the type of dancing that seed and soil mentioned. In fact she took 5+ years of dance, she didn't learn it from the Jersey Shore. I have heard these same stories. The administration already has a policy in the student handbook, which every student has to sign. Why the need for duplication? Simply remove the kids that cross the line and leave the kids that know right from wrong, like my kids and the majority of kids, alone to have a little harmless fun. I have brought my children up to respect themselves and others, and neither of them have engaged in the lewd behavior that has been mentioned. In terms of the Prom Promise, you obviously haven't read my comments. I am not against the administration, I am against them focusing their time and effort on "dirty dancing", when kids have been removed from these dances for overdosing on LSD & prescription pills in the last year. In terms of my Elvis reference, it was a national issue as to the way he moved his hips, it wasn't just a little town in RI issue, so a comparison is definitely valid. If you don't believe me, do a simple google search on Elvis Dancing.
MeanE October 28, 2011 at 02:05 PM
I do not need school administration stepping in to give my children direction. They are respected by their peers, administration, teachers, co-workers, family, and anyone that knows them. Do not lump all kids that bump & grind into an inappropriate category. Common sense by the "adults" is all that is needed.
seed and soil October 28, 2011 at 03:23 PM
again...always interesting to observe the varying viewpoints. In reviewing it all, it appears everyone is more or less on the same page...even meane agrees that getting let's call it getting "too nasty" (ie see my specifics above about the "moon and rub" show) goes over that line in the sand. It appears the act of having the kids signing the policy statement agreement is more at issue. I agree that proper enforcement of the policy is the key here. All the policy talk and having the kids sign something is without merit if the chaperones look the other way and do not take action by pitching out those that step over the proverbial line in the sand.
Eric Paul Sutherland October 28, 2011 at 05:08 PM
they will just take it out to the parking lot back seat anyway...stay focused on the booze and drugs folks
Potts October 28, 2011 at 05:39 PM
"If the contact is violated the student will be placed in"time out" in the media room"...... That's where the real party will be! VIP party in the media room!!! Genital touches for all! Ok, on a more serious note. All of you helicopter parents need to let your kids live! Stop trying to control them with your prudish ways!
Brucernri October 28, 2011 at 06:19 PM
What makes you assume that focus has been lost on booze and drugs?
Brucernri October 28, 2011 at 06:28 PM
So sorry, Potts, that students can't LIVE without grinding their crotch into someone's buttock at a high school dance. Really?
Potts October 28, 2011 at 06:42 PM
Sorry Bruce, but I'm not talking about the individual acts of the dancing. I could care less about thee dance moves. My problem lies with the fact that rarely do adults use common sense when dealing with these type of issues. Let the kids realize what they're doing is dumb on their own accord. Perhaps you forgot what it was like to be a kid. You do things...then you learn from them. Dancing never got anyone pregnant, or caused failing grades. It's just that, DANCING! I'm going to assume that you have children, so you know that by banning something harmless they are going to do it in spite of your 50's era thinking.
MeanE October 28, 2011 at 06:47 PM
@Bruce Did the students sign the student handbook? The answer is yes. Is there a policy in the Student Handbook for "dirty dancing"? The answer is yes. All of the students know what the rules are, including the students who choose to be crude & NASTY, they do not need further clarification or another contract to sign. The "administration" undermines itself by 1. - duplicating their efforts and 2. - not providing consequences to those that break rules already in place. If you want to further clarify anything it should be regarding drugs & alcohol based on the incidents that occurred last year. This is the same administration that allowed multiple photos at the graduation ceremony of a student that provided the LSD to another student last year who was hospitalized. What message does that send? If chaperones and administration can't see lewd acts on the dance floor, what else are they missing that is much more harmful? Let's focus on how couples are dancing and take the focus off the problems that can cause true harm. That makes so much sense.
seed and soil October 28, 2011 at 06:51 PM
amazing to see the comments of some.....really makes so clear that just as many "adults" in our culture/society allow the marinade of brain sewage the media vomits to take root in their thought process. Sad for those children raised by such "adults" who don't have the judgement to properly guide and set limits. Really feeling so very blessed to have had parents who did! My parents never allowed much television viewing...Dad called it the idiot box. Remember folks...just as my wonderful helicopter parents always said..."just because everyone else is jumping off the Brooklyn bridge....should you"? In the end, the students who have parents who love them and care for them deeply and make it a point to communicate about all the developmental and physchological pieces of the pie that need to be in place before any form of intimacy take place - will have their own decisions to make...and will have their own conscience guiding them either on or off the dance floor.
Brucernri October 28, 2011 at 06:54 PM
Thanks for the parenting advice, Josh (approx. 28 yrs old?) Now let me give you some: the art of parenting is neither a)making all the decisions for your children nor b)having the spine to let them make all of their own decisions (as you suggest). It is stepping in and communicating to them when they have made a poor decision, such as exhibiting behavior that may be widely carried out by others their age, and therefore think it is acceptable when it is not. The school administration is just helping define what is now considered "stupid" so parents like yours want have to give their kids a "beatin" for getting kicked out of the dance. P.S. If we have implicit trust that our kids to make the right decision all the time, then why do we need to focus on drugs and alcohol at all?
seed and soil October 28, 2011 at 07:12 PM
potts...just curious????...did you read my post in regard to what took place at a dance a few years back (the skirt lifted/thong panty/gential rub show)???....do you think this is acceptable at a public high school dance event??? my point is that things have gotten much "nastier" than many adults would care to believe....or at least since when I was in HS. The fact reamins that the bottom line is about ENFORCEMENT. Foley set a policy in place then...but it never got ENFORCED. Maybe we should have the chaperones signing something rather that the kids stating that THEY MUST PITCH OUT the few who get out of hand. Just like the kids who show up drunk have their parents called and retrieve them.....the parents of the boy who lifts a girls skirt up over her backside and starts to hump like a dog in heat...and the teenage exhibisionist should have to answer to MOM and DEAR OLD DAD!!...lols
Josh Colacone October 28, 2011 at 07:29 PM
Bruce, being that i am 30, I can remember when i was in school. Maybe you can't. Potts makes good points. Your 1950's ways of thinking is exactly what is going to make these kids CRAZY! So you take away dancing, you push rules on the kids that are for things that don't matter, and what happens when they go to college? They're gonna go NUTS!! you gotta let kids figure some things out for themselves, especially the things that are harmless. otherwise once they get the freedom to experience these things they are going to over do it in a big way. I'm not saying let the kids fornicate on the dance floor. But if you notice someone doing something lewd or over the line, kick him or her out of the dance. Its easy. Then that is where the PARENT should come in and squash it. As for my beatings comment, i didn't need any beatings, the idea of it was enough. I RESPECT my Parents because they TRUST me to do the right things in life. If I stepped out of line they were there to get me back on track. Not the school. I think the school has a lot bigger fish to fry than dirty dancing and they forgot that. oh and Bruce, heres a little advice from someone that was a "kid" not so long ago... If your kid "Swears at an adult" or "walks around school naked" you have failed as a parent. you wanna do some good at a school dance? have a breathalyzer waiting for the kids at the door when they enter and again when they leave the dance. Dancing is not the problem.
Steve Sironen October 28, 2011 at 07:32 PM
They do have breathalyzers at the door. The administrators are all trained to use them, and if there is more question about it, there is a police officer at every dance.
Brucernri October 28, 2011 at 07:39 PM
Read my original post, Potts. I'm not for banning dancing. It is about acceptable behavior. Your proposition is essentially, because it doesn't get anyone pregnant or cause them to fail, it is acceptable. It is harmless. What make you so sure? What makes you so absolutely certain that there isn't some girl who might feel harassed by simply taking the dance floor and then finding some boy grinding his crotch into her butt? Because "everyone" does it? Then what? The school is defenseless against some some sexual harassment suit because they never took an action. Yeah, that never happens. Even MeanE distinguishes acceptability - her child knows better. Clearly, some don't! Also, my argument pertains to behavior of students while at a school function. It has nothing to do with 50's era thinking or being "prudish". Don't assume I'm on a campaign to ban grinding in society. Labeling is far too easy.
seed and soil October 28, 2011 at 07:42 PM
Josh...did you read my comment above about what took place at a NKHS dance when my kid attened 3 years ago?..Question....are you okay with that specific behavior at a public high school event...would you be perfectly okay with it if you got the call from an admistrator telling you your son or daughter was being pitched out for it???? also...can you make a suggestion for what administrators should do to deal with this reality?
Josh Colacone October 28, 2011 at 07:43 PM
@seeds- you're right about the thong humping kids at the dances. I've seen people get bounced out of clubs in providence by their face for that so obviously that should be addressed and the culprit sent home. But i still think its the parent's job to make the kid stop. just getting kicked out of a dance is not going to curb bad behavior. it stems from the home. if there is no consequences then what's the point. If a kid gets caught at the dance dancing like you said, they should be removed from the dance, suspended, if they are sports participants not be let to dress for a game or 2. If there are consequences then most kids won't do bad things. I don't rob liquor stores because i am TERRIFIED of jail. Also, your point about the chaperones doing a better job is a great point. whoever is chaperoning these things need to be talked to as well, cuz you're suspect! I think everything is blown way out of proportion here. Its just dancing. Are some kids going to over do it? yes. Should the other students have to sign a waiver before going to homecoming because of a few bad apples? I don't know, but probably not.
Brucernri October 28, 2011 at 08:05 PM
Josh, the whole point of the contract is to communicate that the behavior is considered lewd and over the line. Parents aren't present at the school dance, so the school assumes some responsibility. That is all the administration is trying to do. Then the parents can take over. No different from the school taking some responsibility for drinking at dance (they have breathalyzers now - assuming some responsibility). You are assuming that the dancing is the same as when you were at NKHS, yet the action was but in place because the teachers that chaparone indicate that the behavior was getting worse - lewd - as you put it. Maybe some kids aren't showing enough RESPECT for the school and the administrators?
NKGOP Watch October 29, 2011 at 12:45 AM
In general restraining behavior of minors to an appropriate conduct sets them up for a lifetime of awareness of appropriateness. I never bought into that amoral "I'm OK you're OK" crap from the hippies. It always seemed a childish, cheap, and lowclass attempt to shortcut what makes us a great, respectable, and civilized society. And THAT results in people like Janice DeFrances who used special ed money to send her kid to a prep school, her pal Halley who did the same for steak and lobster, or our own Governor who recieved a homestead exemption on his Providence property but then campaigned as a "56 year resident of warwick" Hmmmmmm then he appoints DeFrances to run DCYF, a very important postion for the lives of children, many of whom she robbed of funds so she didnt have to pay her kids prep school herself! Not to mention being on our school committee and never showing up to do her responsibilities. http://youtu.be/7FktNj3C0Vc
trudy1 October 31, 2011 at 11:36 AM
Why don't you just dance naked, Teenie? Heck,have sex on the dance floor.
seed and soil October 31, 2011 at 01:55 PM
follow up....heard that all is went well at NKHS Homecoming dance...the kids had a good time...and enjoyed themselves perfectly well sans the moon and rub shows!!
nkstudent January 09, 2012 at 11:27 AM
I am a student at NKHS and I would just like to say very few people were happy with the dance contract and I know many students who refused to go to homecoming because of it.
NKresidenttaxpayervoter January 09, 2012 at 12:58 PM
I like the policy, thank you school faculty for all your hard work.


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