OMG PD: Belligerent and Nude

Naked Man Calls Officer ‘Honky Racist’

Middletown police had their hands full from the get-go with one arrest last week. Police pulled the man over and asked him to exit his car after they reportedly smelled marijuana. Apparently, the man didn’t quite understand the new marijuana decriminalization laws and began yelling, “Marijuana is legal now. Why you being aggressive? This is ‘cause I’m black.” He allegedly refused to cooperate with police, calling them racists and reiterating that he was a grown man.

Things didn’t settle down once they got the man in handcuffs in the police cruiser as he began banging his head against the window while swearing and yelling. If you thought he’d be calmer in his cell at the police station, well, you’re wrong again. According to reports, that’s when the man stripped down to his birthday suit and began to throw dampened toilet paper at the surveillance camera. After moving him to a new cell, the 38-year-old man wrote “[expletive] the police” with his spit on his cell door, along with other expletives that were misspelled.

After reportedly calling an officer a “honky racist” and continuing to vandalism items in his cell, police moved him to yet another cell where he allegedly urinated on the cell door, walls and floor.

Standing Is Just Too Difficult

There’s a new craze sweeping through East Greenwich, apparently. According to reports from the East Greenwich Police Department, police had to deal with three allegedly intoxicated people who were found lying on the ground. The first was a  woman who was reportedly lying on the train tracks before relocating to a spot underneath a pickup truck. Days later, an allegedly intoxicated man fell on the sidewalk outside a coffee shop. Two hours after that, another man was found sleeping outside a pharmacy.

Stop … Stabbing Yourself?

One Johnston man just took the “stop hitting yourself” mantra to a whole new level. Initially, the man told police he had been stabbed and mugged by a Hispanic man outside a dollar store. Police were able to get a full, detailed description of the assailant from the 52-year-old man while he was treated at Rhode Island Hospital for his injuries. Just as police were about to launch into their investigation, the man came clean and told officers that there was no Hispanic man. According to the man, he had cut himself in his car and threw the knife in the woods. He was charged with falsely reporting a crime.